i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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