Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it