This is not my ceiling
I puked a lego.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I don't deserve a penis
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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