how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
