Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
you will always have a special place in my vag
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
