I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
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Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
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So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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