I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize