:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
