Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize