i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
