Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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