everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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