Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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