Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
