All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize