Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
