It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Nicole vs. Life
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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