Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
