OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
My life is pants optional.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
