I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom said you looked used
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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