The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
tell me about the fingering
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