I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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