I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Blood and glitter go together right?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize