how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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