Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Do vagina's smell?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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