I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Everclear isn't food dammit
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
