I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
