yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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