We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
