talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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