What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
