Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
