waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
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I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
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We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
jump out the window naked night went bad
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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