That's intense
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize