Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize