I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
