Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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