We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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