She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
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She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
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On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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