Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
