I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
