Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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