Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
