Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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