When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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