jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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