i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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