where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
