Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize