a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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