God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
